Belonging vs. Fitting
I was recently working with an executive team, and it turned out that one of the members of the team was not expressing his genuine thoughts and opinions.
When we asked him why, he said: “Well, you know, I come from an environment that’s very rough and tumble where you just say what you need to say. People get mad and you just do it anyways and there’s no excuses. That environment didn’t take people’s feelings into account, whereas this company does. We really take people’s feelings into account, and I want you all to like me. I don’t want to be an outcast. I don’t want to be on the outside. So, I don’t always say everything.”
He was making himself smaller to fit in to the team.
The big irony is we don’t actually want team members to fit in. What we want is belonging. Everybody on the team belongs there. They’ve all been chosen to be there. They all have something important to add. And because they belong, they all need to show up fully, as themselves.
When you try to fit in, you make yourself small, you adapt yourself because you think you’re supposed to behave in a certain way, and you’re not bringing your strengths to the team. The team is missing out on what you uniquely have to contribute.
I want you to think about yourself. Where are you fitting in, and where can you bring belonging instead?
To talk this over or share your success stories, contact Assured Strategy today to redeem a free introductory offer.
Assured Strategy is a Business Strategy Coaching Firm that focuses on Strategic Coaching, Executive Coaching, Performance Coaching, and Leadership Training throughout North America with the experience to help companies succeed and grow. Assured Strategy’s coaches educate and mentor CEOs and executive teams in people, strategy, execution, cash, leadership and team building, and the company has represented more than 250 businesses. Assured Strategy offers business strategy coaching, workshops, webinars, leadership groups, employee assessments, and business process improvement services to empower its clients to think strategically and effectively execute their business objectives. For more information, browse our website or call (702) 421-3212.